It’s that time of year. The last semester of high school. The home stretch. Many seniors are thinking more about “what’s next” than “what needs to be done before what’s next.” There is far more high school behind them than ahead of them, and their minds and emotions might have completed high school before their bodies have. This is classic senioritis, with symptoms like:
“My classes don’t matter. I’ve already been accepted to university.”
“What’s our senior class prank going to be?”
“Who am I taking to prom?”
“When do graduation gifts start rolling in?”
And the dreaded, “Who cares?”
This is a tricky time for parents. You want your student to finish well, but how do you support them as they cross the finish line of their high school experience?
Unfortunately, there is no cure for senioritis other than time, but there are some ways to help your student navigate it (and keep your sanity).
Here are some tips:
Continue Academic Support (Without Nagging)
Engage your student by asking open-ended questions about their classes and projects. Although they may seem to be drawing away from you (which is normal), they still need you. Help them establish routines and be aware of important deadlines for their classes. Most of all, be gentle. It is ok to let them experience natural consequences of missed assignments or procrastination sometimes. If your student is going to a traditional four-year university, this will be good practice for their first year away from home.
If your student needs extra help in a challenging subject, make sure they have access to tutors. Most schools have free tutoring available. This is not a time to scold, it is a time to support your student by getting them the resources they need and without passing judgment on their struggle.
Finally, sit down with your student and review graduation requirements just to ensure they are on track and that there are no gaps. The last thing a student wants is the unwelcome surprise of a missing class their last semester. They may need to drop their mixed media art class and that easy A if they are short a math credit!
Help Your Student With Future Planning
By the last semester of high school, your student may already have decided what they will do after graduation. No matter whether they attend a community college, a four-year university, get some trade or technical education, or take a gap year, there are plans to be made. And plans usually involve deadlines.
Make sure you understand the requirements for admission and any scholarships or financial aid that is needed if your student is going on to college. Most require documentation, sometimes lots of it. If it’s overwhelming to you, imagine what it must feel like for your student! Familiarize yourself with the Federal Student Aid website at studentaid.gov. There are lots of resources to help you. Your student’s high school counselor or college admissions counselor can also be a great resource as you navigate all the requirements. Have regular check-ins with your student and spend some time together learning about all the options.
If your student decides to work or take a gap year, it is still a major life transition. Help your student by supporting their decision and giving guidance where needed.
Emotional Support
Graduation is not just a rite of passage or a celebration of achievement, it is a significant step in the journey to becoming an adult. Although your student is probably thrilled to make this step, it is stressful for them and for you! Acknowledge this, name it and hold space for it.
If your student needs to vent, let them. Give them tools to manage their stress or anxiety in a healthy way. This will serve them well into their future, not just in this period of transition. Most importantly, be tuned in to your student’s emotional well-being. If there are signs of significant stress, anxiety or depression, reach out to your healthcare provider or school immediately. If your student appears withdrawn or uninterested in things they typically enjoy, don’t ignore it. This is a warning sign that your student is quickly becoming overwhelmed. Don’t let stress become a mental health crisis!
Life Skills
Your student will soon be living on their own, responsible for laundry, cleaning their room (we hope), and making new friends in a new environment, with new routines and new deadlines. They may even be responsible for providing their own meals for the very first time. It’s a good idea to let them try their hand at these skills before they fly from your nest. If they haven’t done laundry before, teach them. Can they do basic tasks in the kitchen? Can they scramble an egg or heat some soup? Have they ever shopped for groceries? Even if your student will be in a dorm with a meal plan, these are important skills to learn.
Help them know what to do in an emergency! No one wants a crisis, but they can happen. Make sure your student knows who to call and what to say. This includes personal dating relationships. Have conversations about consent, even date rape. These are difficult and uncomfortable things to consider, but it is critical your student knows what to do if they feel unsafe. If your student plans to attend university, review the school’s Title IX policy. Title IX was put in place to protect students in cases of sex discrimination, sexual harassment or misconduct. (NNU’s is here.)
Please do not assume your student knows how to mail a letter, address an envelope, go to the bank or fill the car with gas. Make sure they know how to do these things even if they roll their eyes at you. Your job is to help them be prepared.
Reflect and Celebrate
Graduation is a huge milestone. Celebrate it in whatever way suits your family, but make sure your student feels honored and special. There aren’t too many “once in a lifetime” events, but this is one of them. Cheer, party and eat! But don’t just save the celebration for graduation weekend. Find ways to celebrate them in small ways all semester long!
Finally, don’t forget to reflect on your student’s journey: the highs and the lows. All of it is worth acknowledging, and all of it becomes part of their story. Step back from the daily demands of life and look how far you’ve both come. Some parents make scrapbooks of their student’s childhood. Most of those become treasured possessions. Even if scrapbooking isn’t for you, get creative with ways to commemorate and seal their childhood.
The last semester of high school will fly by. Soon you will be sending out graduation announcements and getting a cap and gown. Commit now to making your child’s last semester of high school be the best ever. Even if they have a bad case of senioritis, it’s never terminal.
